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remember, when I was a little kid, I looked forward to fairly tales being read
out to me at bedtime.
Remember that story about a family of bears ? A papa bear, a mama bear and a baby
bear who came home to find a pretty little girl fast asleep in their bed ?
I loved that story. And I would think : wow, how I wish I could come home and
find a pretty girl in my bed!
These days my little niece and nephew are visiting me.
And at bedtime I offered
to read out 'Alice in Wonderland' to them.
But they made a face and said they
preferred to watch Ekta Kapoor's 'Malice in Blunder land' on TV.
And
I made it very clear that Ekta could do whatever she liked in her house. But no
way was I going to let such nonsense vitiate the taste and culture of impressionable
little children in my house.
Soaps were banned in my house.
My niece and nephew said I was a dictator. He called me Marshal Tito. She called
me Pol Pot.
I said I would grow a Charlie Chaplin moustache, and for all I
cared, they could also call me Hitler.
I told them if they were so interested in utter nonsense, I knew lots of nursery
rhymes that were ideal for children.And
I told them about the cat that diddled on a fiddle, the cow that jumped over the
moon, the dog that laughed and the spoon that ran away with the dish.
My nephew
said he cared two hoots about a spoon running away with a dish. He was more interested
in the cute dish Kareena Kapoor who left Shahid Kapoor and ran off with Saif Ali
Khan.
My niece argued that it was Shahid who left Kareena and ran away with Vidya Balan.
I said I would read out the latest Stardust to them, but alas, that magazine was
also banned in my house.
My niece said, if Stardust and stars were so bad,
why did that cow jump over the moon and reach for the stars ?
My nephew said, if a silly cow could jump over the moon, why was our country spending
crores on its space programme just to put an Indian astronaut on the moon in the
year 2013 ?
I said, when an Indian astronaut walked on the moon, it might be a small step
in the space race but it would be a giant leap for India. My niece said I should
be ashamed for stealing those historic words from Neil Armstrong.
My nephew said that since a cow had already jumped over the moon, the Indian astronaut
on the moon should take care not to step on cow dung.
And my niece felt that
cow was not chewing grass but smoking grass ! Ha, it was so high on marijuana,
no wonder it was over the moon !
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